2002-10-15
Tuesday's Child

Is Full Of Grace...

I feel graceful today... in so many ways. From material to emotional, I feel a graceful aura today that perhaps I cant really explain, but Ill try.

Waking up this morning was like nothing Ive ever experienced before. Just pure blissful joy...

My alarm went off ever so traumatically - while the love of my life, stroked my hair and reminded me of why the day needs me this early in the morning... Kissing my neck, my ears, whispering I love you softly... Taking the trauma out of the dream to waking state. Encouraging me to wake up and share with others what I do best... Truly amazing.

I woke up softly and opened my eyes upon this stunning man, inside shaking my head in disbelief... thinking to myself, this incredible, sexy brilliant man loves me... HE LOVES ME. And I love him back.

Crazy.

Once upon a time I experienced what I thought was true love. I loved another man (doesnt seem possible now) in a way that at the time, felt real and beautiful. He was (and is still) a truly amazing soul... but I didnt love the way he treated me all of the time, and I certainly didnt love waking up with him every morning. Ugh.

Shocking to think about after waking up to such incredible bliss this morning... but once upon a time I was made to feel guilty for waking up before my boyfriend! I mean, major arguments over the fact that if we were at HIS house, he would be adament about the alarm being set for when HE needed to get up. Not all the time, of course, only when he was moody. But still, that's crazy, isnt it? The fact that my job required me to be there sooner was totally irrelevant and disruptive to his sleep schedule. (However, I do snooze, fyi). I remember shaking my head in disbelief one night towards the end of our relationship and actually getting out of bed and leaving -- in total disgust for his disregard of me and my responsibilities.

I know he'd cringe at the truth of this, as we have long since mended our battles, and have a loving friendship that includes laughing at our once major struggles..... but still. It is the experience of past love that helps us relate to our current emotional state...

And so I digress...

Waking up this morning was like a dream come true. He loves me, eye boogers and all.. and he loves everything I do in life that makes me, me. He encourages me to do it well, whatever it is, and be proud, and have confidence...

It sounds so simple, perhaps it is...

I am just truly grateful to be experiencing this level of love for another person. It's amazing how the little things can make or break the ability to be compatible with another person.. and everyday, I find another reason to fall deeper and deeper in love.

I am full of Grace.

previous | next
all past entries

email